Feelings are simply indicators that let us know when we are in alignment with who we truly are and when we are not. This is important because so many people bypass these clues or judge themselves for having them and miss out on an opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of who they are or to make a change for their personal benefit.
When the gas light comes on in your car, you know it’s just an indicator that your gas is low and that you should refuel. That’s it. You received a signal and were able to make a decision about what to do next. So is the same with our feelings. When we feel a certain type of way, it’s just life trying to get our attention about something so that we can discern what’s going on and make an intellectual decision going forward. 

Too often we judge ourselves (or let others judge us) about the feelings we have instead of using them for their informative purpose. Through my years of counseling others, I’ve found that many people have been taught how to react in a particular situation as opposed to innately responding. The interesting thing is that so many people have no idea of the difference! For instance, I counseled a young man who realized he was reacting to a particular situation the same way his mother had done since he was a kid. Becoming aware of this “re-acting”, he was able to decide it wasn’t to his benefit to continue that way. Paying attention to the feelings and what he did with him helped him in his ability to respond in a way that better fit his life.

When you have a feeling, pay attention to it. Don’t beat yourself up for having it, and certainly don’t let anyone else make you feel bad or guilty about it. Just like the gas light in the car, you inner guidance system is trying to let you know something is out of sync. Do yourself a favor and explore why you feel what you feel and then take the best action from there so you can respond to your environment, not re-act out someone else’s emotions.

 


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